Tuesday, October 25, 2011

8 Incredibly Effective Tips for Getting Past Awful Breakup Guilt …


1. Recognize How You Feel

One of the best breakup tips for breakup guilt involves recognizing your guilt for what it is. Guilt is common, but giving into it for an extended period can run you down. It’s important not to make yourself feel bad for feeling guilty. Just because you broke up with someone does not make you a bad person.

2. Pinpoint Your Triggers

Typically, when you start feeling guilty for splitting with someone, it’s because you ran across a trigger that makes you think about your ex. That might be a shirt, a card, a picture, an old book – almost anything that reminds you of that person. Feelings of guilt might even be triggered by evidence that you’re moving on from the relationship. To get past this guilt, you have to start pinpointing what makes you feel that way.

3. Learn What’s Appropriate

Some guilt is appropriate and some guilt is inappropriate. One of the key breakup tips for getting past it has to two with learning which is which. For example, did you do something wrong that caused the breakup? Did you use your ex, cheat, or something like that? If so, guilt is an appropriate response – but, again, none of this makes you a bad person. You’re only a human and you made a mistake. Inappropriate guilt stems from manipulation tactics, which brings me to…


4. Avoid Manipulation Tactics

It’s unfortunately not uncommon for an ex to try to manipulate you. He might flood you with apologies, she might beg you to come back, and there might be lots of vows about how the future will be better if you can just get back together. Friends or family members might question your breakup and express disappointment. Even if it comes from a good place, all of these are cases of emotional manipulation, and you do not need to feel guilty as a result.

5. Think about Your Relationship

Many breakup tips for this problem involve thinking back. Remember, hindsight is 20/20 and everything looks clearer in retrospect. If you’re feeling guilty, take an honest look back at your relationship. Are you idealizing it after the fact? Think about the things that really went wrong, and ask yourself if you need to feel bad for making the right choice.

6. Identify Who’s Inspiring the Guilt

Going back to manipulation tactics, you need to think about the people who make you feel the most guilt. Is your best friend dating one of his friends, and worrying about how this will affect her relationship? Is your mother wondering when you’ll meet The One now? Realizing who’s actually inspiring your guilty feelings is an essential step toward stopping them.

7. Think Positive

This is one of the most important breakup tips you can ever follow, no matter what. You have to think positive. Over time you will stop feeling guilty. Moreover, you’ll recognize that you don’t really have any need to, especially if you split with your ex because you know it was ultimately best for both of you.

8. Have Patience

The key is having patience. It’s a long hard road, and you have to be kind to yourself while you walk it. Don’t force yourself to get over your feelings; let them fade naturally.

If you’re dealing with guilty feelings for breaking up with someone, even though he or she wasn’t right for you, then these breakup tips should definitely help. The thing is, good breakup tips aren’t all about getting over the sadness; they’re also about getting past feelings of guilt and anger, when are extremely common when you split with someone. When you feel guilty about a split, which breakup tips help you the most?

Source: love.allwomenstalk


0 comments:

Twitter Delicious Facebook Digg Favorites More